This post bears the same title as the Sunday school lesson I am preparing to teach to a group of six and seven year olds tomorrow morning. We're all familiar with the story of the five loaves and two fish given to the disciples by a young man sitting on the hillside listening to our Lord's teachings. And we all know that Jesus miraculously transformed that paltry offering into enough to satisfy the hunger of a crowd numbering around ten thousand (if we include women and children in the count).
While skimming through the lesson, it occurred to me that just like the title suggests, Jesus wants us to share. While this might not be an earth shaking revelation for most of us, it just hit me differently tonight. From the moment we, as pastor's wives, followed Christ to serve alongside our husbands in ministry, He's been calling us to share our lives with others. Still not blown away by this thought, are you?
Well, it just hit me. As a pastor's wife, God wants me to share everything I have with those around me. Just like the young man who gave all in his possession to minister to the physical needs of those around him on the hill, Jesus wants me to be willing to do the same. This includes my time, my home, my possessions and many times my family. But if I'm being honest, I don't want to share!
It's not that I'm a stingy, uncaring person, no, it's just that I like having all of those things to myself. I want to decide how I spend my time and with whom. As far as my home, shouldn't it be a refuge from the storms brought on by the church people? My possessions? I tithe and give offerings above that. So, really, isn't that enough? And my family? Would I really be a good mom or wife if I allowed church people to take up time that we could instead spend, as a family, playing Monopoly?
So what's the answer? If Jesus wants me to share everything and I don't really want to, I could find myself in a real fix feeling crushed by the weight of guilt. That is until I consider grace. The grace that saved us is also the grace poured out upon us daily that covers our weak, selfish, sinful selves. It's the grace of God that allows me to give more of myself even when I don’t feel like doing so. Yet at other times that same grace makes an allowance for me to pull back a little. There are some days when I'm all in. No matter what He asks me to do, I'm ready to give it everything within me. Contrast that to the days when I'm weary and worn out bearing closer resemblance to a dishrag instead of a disciple.
I'm so grateful that while Jesus wants me to share, He also understands my heart and the selfishness inside of it as a result of my humanity. I'm so grateful that while I'm called to walk in Christ's footsteps, more often than not, He graciously winds up carrying me.
I need more of You, Lord and less of me!